In a perfect world, parents make the rules and kids happily follow them. But the reality is, kids are always going to test boundaries, whether on the playground or at the computer. Below are some tell-tale signs that your child may be breaking the rules for online behavior, indicating the need for internet monitoring.

1. You or your child receives unusual amounts of unsolicited e-mail or pop-ups. This can be a sign that your child has released his personal information online. There are many enticing contests and sweepstakes, offering free MP3 players or gaming consoles, for instance, as a means of getting your child’s personal information. Alert your children to the possible schemes and remind them never to give out personal information online. Take advantage of internet monitoring software to watch for further problems.


2. Your child tries to block the computer screen or quickly closes the window in which he is typing.* * A child’s reflexes can be quick when he knows he’s breaking the rules. If you notice quick or unreasonable attempts to conceal his computer screen, you should investigate further. It may be time to use internet monitoring, such as Safe Eyes.


3. Your child spends an unusual amount of time online, especially in the evenings. Sometimes children, especially if they’re home alone for extended periods, can become drawn into the social life that chat rooms and Instant Messaging offer. If this is the case, find out who they’re talking to and what chat rooms they’re visiting. While predators can be online at any hour, they are particularly active in the evenings. Internet monitoring can help you better protect your children from potential predators.


4. Your child changes her password and/or will not share it with you. It’s a good idea to keep up with your child’s password. If she becomes secretive about accessing her account, it may be time for you to dig deeper. Internet monitoring can alert you to such password changes.
5. Your child uses an online account other than her own. Public computers, in libraries or coffeehouses, are usually Internet ready and sometimes offer unlimited access that your child may not have at home. If your child seems to prefer the unlimited access, ask for an explanation. Internet monitoring may be needed if they won't share their reasons.


6. Your child withdraws from family or friends. Sexual predators pull children closer to them by pushing them away from family and friends. Children also tend to become withdrawn after being sexually victimized either physically or verbally. The use of internet monitoring software can help you to prevent such things from happening.


7. You discover photos of strangers on your child’s computer. Do random searches of your child’s computer for files with photo file extensions such as.jpg,.tiff,.gif, or bmp. Ask your child to identify any photos of strangers, and if any are suspicious write down the information your child gives you about the person. Internet monitoring can allow you to stay a step ahead of the predators who may try to take advantage of your child.


8. Your child receives phone calls from strangers. Many predators prefer phone conversations. A predator may ask the child to call collect, and when the child calls, the predator records the phone number through caller ID. A quick phone number search using any basic search engine could also reveal your child’s home address (To try it, type your phone number into Google and watch as your name and home address pop up). Internet monitoring can alert you to personal information being posted online, such as your phone number or address.


9. Your child receives mail, gifts, or packages from someone you don’t know. Predators may try to send photos or gifts through the mail. Gifts are frequently a form of seduction used by sexual predators. If any of this activity occurs, take action immediately.


10. You discover inappropriate images or files on your child’s computer. This warning sign also requires immediate action. Find out the origin of the file. If it’s an image your child has voluntarily downloaded from a commercial entity, it’s time to install or improve your internet monitoring and filtering software, as well as restrict your child’s Internet usage. If an individual sent the file, contact law enforcement.

Above all, trust your parental instincts. You know your child better than anyone else. Even if you cannot point to one of the signs above, when you sense something is wrong, ask questions. Use Internet monitoring software to stay abreast of your child's Internet activities. Internet usage can be eliminated completely until the issue is resolved.

Don’t ever feel as if you’re overreacting to the signs. Since 1998, there have been over 18,000 recorded incidents of “online enticement of children for sexual acts.”** If you are overreacting, those consequences are much more bearable than doing nothing at all.

Sources:
* http://www.senate.state.ny.us/sws/SD01/LaValle%20OnlineSafety9843.pdf
**http://www.cybertipline.com/en_US/documents/CyberTiplineFactSheet.pdf

*This article used with permission from InternetSafety.com, Inc.*